She has a way with people especially men and for some reason I just cannot get over this feeling of jealousy, and now that I am writing about it, the anger is building up inside of me – again. Jealousy is one of the biggest traps within relationships. The feeling of possession that usually accompanies love and being in love ignites jealousy, but it can sometimes become a bigger influence than the love itself. Many couples have been driven apart by an overdose of jealousy. There isn’t much you can do, when you tend to get jealous easily, however, this emotion is not harmful by itself if you know how to deal with it. It should not be the cause of mistrust in your partner, or even of the end of your relationship.
I have known great relationships to have come to an end simple because of jealousy; in fact not only if you find your partner is sharing what in your mind he/she should be sharing with you alone, but some persons are jealous of their partner’s success. Don’t give too much power to jealousy, and certainly do not confuse it with love.
Be clear about your feeling
When you are jealous, you should not hide it. Be open to your partner about your feelings. Explain what the situation is about and find a solution together. To communicate with your partner is essential within a relationship. You have to know what goes on in his or her head and this goes both ways. Never be embarrassed about your feelings of jealousy, discuss it and not hide it hoping that it will go away with time, you may suppress and not recognise that person when you cannot suppress anymore.
Demonstrate at all times the feeling of trust, even when you sometime doubt a scenario, before jumping to point a finger, talk it over. Be positive about your relationship, it is important that you give off a signal of I trust you at all times, as unrealistic as that sounds, it is the key to happy relationship. Let your partner know even with your fear they may not be trustworthy that you do trust them. If you are really convinced, that your suspicions are true, you need to talk, some will deny, but at least you put your cards on the table.
Space is important
A relationship should not be based on the possession of each other, but on freedom and trust. Allow your partner to have social contact with others. Don’t be alarmed by little things. And ask same of your partner. When the foundation of your marriage/relationship is built on trust and friendship you will find that when you spend time apart instead of an insecure feeling you cannot wait to share your day with the one you love.
Jealousy is an emotion if managed properly can be used in a positive way, at least it is saying this person means the world to you, and if that is the case then you cherish instead of arguing and fighting for leverage. I am still jealous when I see men buzzing all around her, but what the heck, when the night is over she will be in my bed.