It is a painful experience when you love someone and love is not returned and equally as painful if someone is in love with you but for some reason you cannot return the love to them. There are ways in dealing with this kind of experience in fact there is a name for it, unrequited love. There are ways in dealing with it without chaos, so let us dig in and discuss.
Accept that the feeling of love is not a conscious decision and should not be taken personally when love is not returned to you. Once you are aware of this you will not feel that intense level of rejection that is crippling and most times damaging.
What we need is a healthy dose of optimism for happiness. When you feel that if that person you love is reciprocated will make you happy then that is a recipe for feeling upset, depressed, or bitter. You may also find that it’s a sense of neediness (which you may be conveying without even realizing it) that’s turning off the person you love, perhaps by making them feel like they are on a pedestal that they don’t want to be on.
Take a break from this person, as creating space will assist in the process of moving on from that helpless and down feeling you get when you constantly spend time around a person you know is not interested in you. Some persons enjoy the adoration and will convince you to not go away, so before saying anything just go quietly and avoid places you may run into this person.
Love is not Returned
Alone time, is a good way to build your self-esteem. If you find that you get a low desperate feeling when persons are not around then it’s time to spend some time alone, doing things that is fulfilling and you will find that when love is not reciprocated you will move on so much easier to the next experience.
Unconditional love should be your goal, if you feel that you really, truly love this person, then perhaps you can love them unconditionally. You’ll know you’ve reached that point when you can genuinely feel happy for them, even if that happiness does not include you. With unconditional love, there’s no sense of loss, because it’s about deriving all your happiness from the act of giving – even though love is not returned.