They were going along nicely and out of the blue she felt a sting across her face. It was not the pain that she reacted to but the shock of being slapped by her husband and friend who she has known for over 12 years.
She heard the buzz in her ears and then began to cry, immediately he stopped the car and started to apologise, how sorry he was and that he would not be doing something like that again.
They were on their way to their favourite spot, she was talking about having a great time and making plans as they were driving and thought that he was not his usual self and decided to let him have it, that he was getting really boring and she hoped he would not ruing the trip this time, in previous years all he wanted to do was sleep.
She just wanted him to take her home.
He was protesting, “let us go”, he said, trying to make things right, promising to do better this time, but it was all too late!
“I said take me home!” she muttered but with a firm tone that he was not accustomed to and so he stopped the car at a petrol station and they started the journey home in silence.
When she got home, her head was all over the place and the one person that she could turn to was her dad. She called him up and said she needed to get away for a while and was going to be staying with him and her mother, he said nothing and within a few hours he came and got her.
She always knew that her husband had a temper, but she never thought that he would hit her, she knew that they had not been communicating very well for a while now, but she never thought that he would hit her, she knew he was probably cheating with someone, she had no proof, but little signs here and there made her doubtful, she confronted him and he denied it, but she never thought that he would hit her.
If your loved one has an anger problem, you probably feel like you’re walking on eggshells all the time. But always remember that you are not to blame for your loved one’s anger. There is never an excuse for physically or verbally abusive behaviour. You have a right to be treated with respect and to live without fear of an angry outburst or a violent rage.
Despite what many people believe, domestic violence and abuse is not due to the abuser’s loss of control over his behaviour and temper. In fact, abusive behaviour is a deliberate choice for the sole purpose of controlling you. If you are in an abusive relationship, know that couples counselling is not recommended—and that your partner needs specialized treatment, not regular anger management classes.
Her time away was what she needed to gain perspective, her relationship was over for a while, but it took one episode to finally put an end to it.
If you are in an abusive relationship, seek help now!