Relationship Guide Review

4 Steps in Forgiving & Forgetting

Forgiving & Forgetting

What does it mean when we talk about forgiveness? How can we let it go when someone deliberately hurt us beyond repair? Rather than brush away the pain, many of us get stuck emotionally, lick our wounds, allow ourselves to become afraid. Time passes and it becomes harder to move forward. Before we know it, years will pass and we are still there in our heads, holding on to a grudge. For us to be free of malice, we have to let go from the past hurt, learn from it and embrace today and the future.

Italy, Tuscany, View of guilty young man with luggage from hotel window

Let me share with you some things that we need to do in letting go from a grudge:

  1. Meditate daily. This is important that you clear your mind of the negative chatter and concentrate on how you can grow from your pain. Reflect on the positive aspects of moving on, such as how letting go of the past opens up room for better things to come into your life. It is a fact that after a broken relationship you become better if you take the right attitude to separation and divorce, it would be difficult to perceive it at times, but you will be stronger.

  2. Write your grudge on a piece of paper, choose an empty object, place the slip or slips of paper that you wrote the grudge on, then take the container out to your yard and bury it. From then on, whatever you wrote on the paper no longer exist and you can’t hold on to what doesn’t exist. You may think this is silly, but you try it and see how powerful the mind is, and how the little things we do can impact us.

  3. Work with a counsellor or life coach to overcome obstacles or mental health issues that are keeping you from being able to let go of your grudge. Armed with newfound knowledge shared with you by a professional, you can start looking forward to moving away from the past of your grudge for good.

  4. Journal your thoughts. It works when you journal your thoughts and feelings about how poorly certain people treated you and what events occurred in your life you felt were unfair. If you are not good with words, but enjoy art, then draw or paint it, pain can be expressed in art. Next, write or draw your intentions to stop the unfairness dialog so you can start to let go of the past and move on.


Forgiving & Forgetting

When you let go of the grudge you will feel a sense of relief, because what happened yesterday should not affect your today and set you back. When you allow the past to affect you in a negative way you are talking to yourself literally. You cannot change what is in the past, so let go of the grudge and move forward to a bright and happy tomorrow.



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Relationship Guide Review
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