I must be an expert on this subject because the more I learn about happiness, the more I have come to understand and believe that LONELINESS is an important obstacle to consider and battling loneliness is a fight that is on-going and must be taken seriously.
Got a call from a friend who said, “I am battling this lonely feeling and I honestly do not know what to do about it, what steps can I take to avoid this feeling?”
I started reading and then came across a fascinating book written by Emily White, Lonely – a memoir. She spoke about her own experiences and research into loneliness, she did not get into specifics but this is what I got and I am sharing because most of the persons I interact with just want to get back with the ex because they miss them and would rather a dysfunctional relationship than to experience the awkward feeling of loneliness.
It is entirely reasonable to feel lonely yet still feel as though you need time to yourself. Loneliness feels draining, distracting, and upsetting; desired solitude feels peaceful, creative, restorative. It is good to sit and plan what you are going to do with your alone time and trust me the time will pass so fast those anxious moments will disappear.
When working with a Youth Choir, attending the gym and caring for my plants helped in alleviating the feeling of being lonely, so nurturing others is a great way of battling loneliness.
There are two factors that you must take into consideration; you need to have both social life and an intimate attachment. We are indeed social beings and need interaction if the programme well this can be satisfied if we get out, not stay by ourselves and complain that we have no one.
Rest is important. One of the most common indicators of loneliness is broken sleep – taking a long time to fall asleep, waking frequently, and feeling sleepy during the day. Sleep deprivation, under any circumstances, bring down the mood of persons, your are more likely to get sick, dampens your energy, if you tackle this issue early you should be good.
When you are battling loneliness you tend to see couples walking around holding hands and then the envy starts, this is when you will make a mistake in clinging to the wrong person, be patient, you will find your mate. Loneliness can trigger negativity, makes you critical and judgemental. If you recognise that your loneliness may be affecting you in that way, you need to take steps in avoiding this.
If you use your time of alone properly you can battle loneliness and that will certainly lead to a more effective and fun loving person when given the opportunity to partner with someone, but if you fuss about the opposite sex as being evil, and relationships are waste of time, while secretly hoping for one, then you may end up in one making the same mistakes over again. This is the time to spend quality time with you and make yourself into a better person.